Not My Strength, but His

My eyes have been opened and now I truly see.  Amidst the bleakness of human failures and corruption there exists a beauty that permeates everything, a beauty so vivacious I cannot believe I had not seen it before.  But God opened my eyes this week, often times with a divine slap to the back of my head :)

Let me explain a bit:  Before beginning a new project, I have always come at the situation with the mindset of “What can I do to make it better?” or “How can I help fix this?”  This is often the mindset of anyone setting out on a mission trip or service project and it is often the biggest mistake we can make.  If we go into it with our minds made up and our focus on what we can do, we are blind to the beauty of what we can learn and receive from those we are trying to help.  This week has been a huge lesson in this for me.

On Friday, the girls here in the house and I began playing soccer at a local court.  I was nervous since my past expertise on the sport verges on the nonexistent… nonetheless I put on my game face and acted like I knew what I was doing.  From the start, kids from the community began to join in on our game and soon we had multitude of players on each team.  Though they were young, they had fancy feet, let me tell you.  I felt very much out of my element.  And then, they made me goalie...  Inside I was mortified and fearful that I was about to make a fool of myself in a very public way!  BUT, by the grace of God, I may not be able to use my feet but I do know how to use my hands :)  I protected that goal like a fiend and wowed everyone with my talents (ok, maybe I’m exaggerating a bit).  In the end, I learned that though I could bring nothing to the table in terms of footwork and had to bow to the talents of others, they still welcomed me as a player and gave me an important position to play (which surprisingly turned out to their advantage).  The lesson for this day: embrace those “below” you and they might just surprise you with what they can do :)

Susie, Luli and I taking a break

The following morning, I went on a hike with a couple high school girls and a local 5^th grade class.  I was a bit nervous because I was the designated driver (my first time driving here by the way) and I was (am) way out of shape.  So this day presented many challenges for me.  I began my day by confessing my fears and weaknesses to God and prayed that he would give me the strength to get through the day.  Despite my fears, the day turned out to be one of the best days I’ve had so far :)  Driving was a blast, the people I went with were great company, the hike wasn’t too difficult for little ol’ me, the landscape was breathtaking, and the weather was beautiful!  What an answer to prayer!  I felt as if God was slapping me on the back of the head and saying “About time you let me help.”  Thank you God—I learned my lesson :)

Our beautiful hike 

And each day now, I can see the work of God more clearly in my life and I am learning to let him take the lead in my day and not rely on my own strength but on his.  Please pray that I continue leaning on God every day and letting him lead me.  Thank you for all of your prayers of support and words of encouragement.  Stay tuned!